A Girl In Dreaming
by Zenkx
Summary: My subconscious is telling me something...
1. Introduction

AUTHOR'S NOTES

My first Neil Gaiman Fanfic! Whoo-hoo!

Can I be honest? I actually don't own a lot of Neil Gaiman books. The only works of his that I have is a copy of Sandman: Dream Hunters with Yoshitaka Amano (because I LOVE Yoshitaka Amano's art) and a copy of Fragile Things.

However, I read Dream Hunters far too many times to be healthy (XD). And I immediately loved the concept of Dream/ Morpheus. Personally, I love the fact that someone had personified something so mystical and strange as dreams. I know scientists have told us that dreams are just some images that our brain fires up during our sleep. But maybe there is something more to it.

I've had dreams that are downright weird (like my blood-whales dream O_o), understandably scary (death of my loved one dreams), and strangely repetitive.

I made a story of my strangely repetitive dream into a fanfic with Dream. How's that for weird.

By the way, after the 5th chapter, you'll have the choice to choose 3 endings. Why? Because I have envisioned three possible endings to this story.

They said stories that are close to real life are the most interesting. Hmm. Well, I hope this story interests you, because it is, at some point, happening to me right now.


	2. Chapter 1

There comes a point in every woman's life when they wished they were born a man.

That moment came when I met him. My boss. He had lost his wife then, and he was, unknown to others, in pain. I knew it was kind of pain it was. I experienced it too, though I was much younger.

Everyone thought that he was doing okay. He was a man, for goodness sake. He was taught by society to bear the pain without crying. To swallow it up and shed no tears. Men are not supposed to cry. They would be called "pussies" if they did.

I pitied him at first. To be left behind by someone they loved, and never see them, or hug them, or speak to them again… it is unbearable. I pitied him because he was such a good man, and yet this kind of tragedy had to happen to him.

He has a six-year old son, too. And to raise a child of such young age alone, I'm pretty sure it would be difficult.

But he trudged on. He worked endlessly and tirelessly. Within a few weeks, he was smiling and laughing again. He made sure he had time for his son, and now he's getting him to prepare for school. If he was lonely or sad, he never showed it.

And because of that, he earned my respect.

He was a really good boss. He was kind, but stern when needed. At times, I saw him angry, but he made sure that his anger never ruled over him. He treated his workers well, and gave them proper praise and sanction when needed. Most of us liked him and joked around with him, but when the time for work comes, we treat him with respect and we do our best to make sure he is satisfied with our work.

I think, everything started to get messed up a couple of years ago.


	3. Chapter 2

We had a beach outing then, and a team building. I was assigned to his group. It was fun. Our group bonded well. Even though we were tired from all our activities, we had a lot of fun, and we laughed a lot. Once I fell to my knees laughing and tired, and he came up to me to pull me up. I held his hand. It was rough… and warm. I liked it. It was like a comforting touch to me. I smiled as I stood up, and he smiled back and patted my back, his arm going around me. I forgot to breathe for 5 seconds. He was so warm. I've never felt that much heat from someone.

When our activities were done, we were allowed to swim in the beach that afternoon. I stayed quite a while in the water, and when I rose from it, it was almost night. I loved swimming, but it was getting cold. As I walked towards where I was staying with my other coworkers, I saw him. My boss. He was shirtless.

I think my breath got stuck to my throat. I hid behind a tree to gaze at him.

He was not muscular, but not too fat either. He was a little dark-skinned… and hairy. Well, not so much, but it was an average amount of hair. They were black against his dark skin, spreading through his chest and to his dark nipples, before running down his stomach, to his navel and lower… where his belt and pants hid everything from view.

My face flamed. He couldn't see me, but I was afraid that he'd catch me staring at him. I quickly ran to our cottage.

That night, I couldn't sleep. All I could think of was him. His smile. His kindness. His warm, comforting touch… that dark path of hair that led to heaven. I shivered so violently that my officemate thought I had a fever. I told her I was fine.

I've had thoughts like this before. It was wanting. To me, it wasn't love… yet. Just pure lust. I've never had a man who was hairy. And I wanted to know where that trail of hair led. I wanted to do much to him, that I blushed just thinking about it.

A year after that day at the beach, I still wanted him. I would sneak peeks at him, smiling as sweetly as I dared without being too flirty. I would smile when he would, be comforting when he seemed stressed. I would work the hardest and the best that I could when he needed something from me.

At night, when I sleep, I dream of him. Some of my dreams would make ladies my age blush. Others would just make me wake up refreshed and happy. Once I woke up as if in a nightmare, because I dreamt of him kissing some woman without a face. It scared me. But most of the time, I had the kind that made me wake-up all giddy and happy. It was that kind of dream, like you were in paradise, and it was just me and him, under the starry skies, talking and laughing, gazing into each other's eyes.

They were the best dreams I ever had.

But in the real world, I started seeing him in my corner of the office, talking to his phone. He was whispering, and smiling, and chuckling, and talking again. He whispered into the phone like he was whispering to a lover.

And it broke me.

He was in love again, and dating. It tore me apart. I didn't know why. The next thing I knew is that I couldn't breathe and I had to run to the bathroom. I cried in there for a while. When I left, my eyes were red and puffy, and I couldn't bear to look at him.

This had been happening so frequently, that all I could do was watch and silently endure the pain. And at night I would find comfort in my dreams of him.

I realize now that I was deeply, hopelessly, head-over-heels in love with him.

But he loved somebody else. The woman he talks to on the phone.

That's the reason I wanted to be a man. I wanted to avoid this kind of pain. When men are heart-broken, they have so many ways to deter it or forget it even for a while. Beers, basketball or baseball games, gambling, whores… these are the kind of deterrents men have. For us women, it's very few. Society has taught us that drunk women are uncultured. Women who turn to food for comfort become "gluttons" or "slobs". Sports loving women are tomboys. Gambling women are called gold-diggers. And women who pay men for sex are called whores.

If there are double standards for everything that women did to forget and ease a broken heart, what are women left with?

What am I left with…?


	4. Chapter 3

I was thinking about that when it happened.

I was walking home, thinking about this. The streets seemed deserted as I walked. There were no cars, no people… just me walking home at night, along the dark street, with a broken street light blinking above me. It was really quiet. Everyone in the neighborhood must be asleep. It was the kind of quiet that'll help you think.

And I did.

Well, at least for a minute.

Suddenly, there was a screech, and a bright light. In my thoughts, I didn't hear a car speeding up on the street, and before I knew it, it was right behind me.

I felt the impact.

I didn't feel pain, strangely enough. Just feeling of flight. But of course, when I hit the pavement, that was when I felt twinge of pain. But just for a second.

After that, it was just darkness. And then a different light.

It was you. You were the one that woke me up.

You were the one that brought me here. You know who I am, what I dream about, and what is happening to me as of this moment. Even though I'm confused, I know that's you'll tell me why am I here.

So, now that I've told you my story, "King of All Night's Dreaming"… "Morpheus"… what will happen to me now?


	5. Chapter 4

The King of All Night's Dreaming sat on his throne, his hand on chin, watching the woman in front of him. Contrary to what she said, she didn't look confused. She looked resolved. Like she was accepting the reality of whatever he may say.

"_**So you are aware that you lost consciousness, and that I had brought you here."**_ He said, watching her, but his mouth was not moving. It was like he was talking to her through telepathy., _**"Most people normally seek me out in different ways. But you… I had to bring you here. Your story… is fascinating to me."**_

The girl merely watched him, nodding a little bit at his words.

He straightened and held his hands in front of him, his fingers touching each other, as if he was deep in thought. _**"I have seen your dreams. They are, as you can imagine, normal to every other human. When humans want something, they dream of it so much. And when they cannot bear the wanting anymore, they do what they can to achieve it. If it's money, love, friendship, material things.. they'll do whatever they can to get it." **_He looked at her, his head inclining a bit, _**"And yet you… you who dream about this man so often it is beyond wanting… do not do anything to try and get him. Why?"**_

The girl's composed features floundered a little bit, and her confusion revealed in her nervous smile. "What do you mean, 'why?', my King?"

The King, strangely, smiled, _**"Why have not tried to tell him of how much you love him? Why do you not go and try to get him for yourself?"**_

The girl blinked in shock, her mouth opening a little bit, but no words were coming out. Instead she looked down at her hands and twiddled with her hands as she thought. The King merely watched her and soon she spoke.

"I think… I think I have reasons." She said finally, "I was afraid of being rejected. I loved him so much that it hurts, but I fear him saying no would hurt me more. I am just human after all. I am as prone to having my heart broken as any other human in this world. And… I believed I was doing the right thing. He was happy now, even if in the past he had been hurt so much. He's smiling now, and laughing and anticipating whatever life will be giving him. Perhaps the woman to whom he talks to on the phone so much… maybe she was making him happy. I didn't want to take him away from her. I didn't have the heart to make her suffer if it meant I would be happy."

The King's eyebrow lifted, _**"You prefer to have this man in your dreams, rather than in reality?"**_

She thought about it for a while, but soon nodded.

"_**Why?"**_The King asked again.

She seemed to shrug, "Because… it's much more… 'safer' in my dreams. I can have him to myself, without having to take him away from his son or his new fiancé. It's… almost like living two different realities. There's the reality that he is in love with somebody else, and then there's that 8 hour reality in my head that he loves me back. I know it seems weird, but… that is how I see it."

The King was thoughtful as he looked at her, _**"It is not wise to dwell in dreams, child."**_

She shrugged again, more noticeable now, "It does not do well to dwell in sadness either." She scratched her chin as if she was thinking, "My dreams take me away from my sadness that I face during my reality. In my dreams I can be happy in his arms, which is what I wanted. It's probably not real, but it makes me happy enough to make me wake up every morning, and still smile at him even though I was hurting."

The King was silent and merely gazed at her for several minutes, that it made her self-conscious and she blushed. It was a while before he slowly stood, his black robes falling to the floor. He was tall, that when he looked at her, he had to look down, and she had to look up. He stared at her for a minutes and he turned to his left. He started walking to what looked like a long hall and he raised his hand to indicate that she follow him. A raven flew down from somewhere and landed on his shoulder. The girl watched as it bent down to the King's ear and sort of whispered. The King nodded.

"_**Do you know what happened to you?"**_ The King asked.

"I know I am not dead." The girl said, "If I were dead, I know I'd be in Heaven or Hell… wherever I am supposed to be."

"_**You are right."**_ The King said, _**"Your body is currently in a hospital, in a comatose. That is why you are here in the Realm of Dreaming."**_

"Will I… will I live?" The girl asked nervously.

The King stopped and was silent for a while, _**"I do not know." **_He said finally, before walking again, _**"That will depend if you want to wake or dream a little longer."**_

"Is that how it is… with all comatose patients?" She asked, and the King turned to a corner. She followed.

"_**Some of them. Others did not want to live or dream anymore."**_ The King said, and he approached a door. He turned to her and looked intently into her eyes, _**"If you wish, I shall leave you in this room and let you dream for a while."**_

"And if I want to wake up?" She asked, as the King laid a hand on the door handle.

"_**I will know of your decision, and send you back to your reality."**_

The girl looked at the door, and nodded, "Can I dream for a while before I decide to come back to reality?"

The King nodded slowly.

She laid a hand on the door, "What will I dream about?"

The King smiled a little, _**"What you've always dreamed about, child."**_ And he opened the door.


	6. Chapter 5

There was a bright light, but it didn't hurt my eyes that much. It was just white everywhere. An endless room with nothing in it.

But I saw him. He was looking at me, and smiling, like he waited for me for a long time. He was as I remembered him at that time at the beach. Shirtless, wearing pants, but looking good.

I think I ran. I couldn't remember. I was just so happy to see him here. He opened his arms, and I went into him. His warmth enveloped me. And his clean scent filled my nostrils. He was saying my name over and over in my ear, as if my name was some kind of lyric he had memorized from a beloved song.

His arms went around me, and that was the only time I realized that I was naked, and his hands were caressing my back and shoulders. The warmth was unbearable. I looked up to him, into his dark eyes, and they were so full of love and wanting. His lips came down to mine, and it was heaven.

His lips were warm and soft, and it alternated from kissing me passionately and uttering my name. I clung on to him. He pushed my down into the ground, which soon felt like grass behind me. I looked around, as his lips came down my cheek and to my neck. The endless room of white had become an endless room of grass and flowers.

His hand pulled my chin towards him again, and I smiled. He kissed me again urgently, as his hands, so warm and strong, roved down from my face, to my shoulder and to my chest. I sucked in a deep breath and pulled him to me, my own mouth kissing him ferociously, as growls of our wanting filled the air.

I don't know how long it lasted. Days. Weeks. Months. Years. I was happy. He made me laugh, he made me so… warm. And he made me feel loved. But I knew, in the back of my mind, I had to make a decision. To dream forever, or to come back to reality. One would make me happy forever, but would sadden the other people in my life. And the other would make me feel miserable, but would make everyone else in my life happy.

I gazed at the face of my dream beloved. His real counterpart would probably not feel the same way I do, but…

I had to make a decision.


	7. CHAPTER 6 TO 7 NOTES

CHAPTER 6 TO 7 NOTES

To this point, you can choose three possible endings to my story.

Chapter 6: Ending 1

Chapter 6 & 7: Ending 2

Chapter 6 & 7: Ending 3

Feel free to read them according to which ending you'd like to know, by clicking on the top right menu (Chapter Menu). Thank you! ^_^v


	8. Chapter 6 Ending 1

"_**I'm sorry."**_

The King of All Night's Dreaming stood in front of the girl, looking apologetic, the room with the girl's dream closed behind her. Beside the king was a lithe-looking woman, with black hair. She was wearing leather pants and a sleeveless shirt, and had a large, silver ankh around her neck. She, too, looked apologetic, but it was a slightly more honest look, compared to the King.

"What do you mean?" The girl asked.

"_**Your body in the human realm has died due to your injuries."**_ The King said, _**"Which means…"**_

The girl's breath stopped, "I'm dead?"

The King nodded, _**"This is my sister, Death."**_He indicated the woman beside him, _**"She, too, is one of the Endless… responsible for the souls of humans. She will help you and lead you to your new, shall we say, afterlife."**_

The woman, Death, smiled and nodded at her, _"Your self-sacrifice for love and your past generosity and kindness has earned you a place in Heaven. I have been sent to take you there, and give you over to the angels who will send you over past the Gate of Heaven."_

The girl paled a little, but she nodded a little, "I never got to say goodbye to everyone. But… I guess it is how it has to be." She looked up at Death and smiled a little. "At least you don't look like the Death Reaper we normally know."

Death laughed, _"It was just something humans make me look. But I do sometimes have a cloak and scythe. But I think Dream is more imposing than I am, don't you think?"_

The girl grinned as Dream scowled down at his sister. But soon, she stopped and looked up at Dream again. "What will happen to… him?"

Dream shook his head, _**"I do not know. My brother, Destiny, knows his fate… but he is not allowed to tell anyone. But I think he will be fine. As will your family."**_

The girl smiled peacefully, "Then… I have served my purpose in this world, it would seem." She looked at Death again, "I think I'm ready… Death."

Death nodded, and she held out her hand. The girl took it, and soon both were gone, leaving The King of All Night's Dreaming standing by the door of the girl's dream.

A few moments later, Death joined him again. She watched her brother as he continued to gaze at the girl's door. _"It is kind of tragic… to have died and not be able to tell a person you love them."_

"_**You have methods to do that. But I think this for the best for the people around her."**_ The King said as he locked the door, and started walking back to his throne. Death followed him.

"_Isn't there supposed to be a lesson in all this?"_ Death asked as they walked, _"I was thinking about it and…"_

"_**We have lived for far too long, and have learned many lessons from the living, the dead and the dreaming." **_The King said, _**"What more lessons do you need?"**_

"_Perhaps"_ Death said, _"Then I shall leave now. See you around, brother."_

Death faded off from Dreaming, and soon a Raven landed on his throne, "My King, there is monk that has come to Dreaming to speak with you."

The King nodded, and waited for the monk, still thinking of the girl and her dreams.

Dreams, that he knew, were the same as his dreams once were.


	9. Chapter 6 For Ending 2 and 3

"_**You've decided to go back."**_

It was not a question, it was a statement. He felt her resolve and he agreed to it. She stood before him again, the room with her dream closed behind her.

She nodded, "Yes, I've decided to go."

The King nodded, _**"You can still dream this same dream you've had when you sleep, but it can never be just as long…"**_

She shook her head, "No, I've decided to stop dreaming about this. I will go back, and make this a reality."

The King looked at her, _**"And your fear of being rejected by this man?"**_

"It's still there." She said, "But… I decided to confront it. I would never know if he likes me back or not, at least not until I ask him. If he likes me back, then all is well, but if not…" She looked up at him, "Then my 8-hour dream would be enough for me… at least until someone else comes around to take me from my dreams."

The King's eyebrow rose, _**"You humans are complicated."**_

She laughed, and nodded, "You should've already realized that, considering you have been The King of All Night's Dreaming for such a long time."

"_**True."**_ The King raised his hand and positioned it on her forehead, _**"Are you ready?**_**"**

The girl nodded, and closed her eyes. And The King of All Dreaming laid a finger on her forehead.

"_**I hope your dreams become reality."**_


	10. Chapter 7 Ending 2

It was darkness. And there was pain.

I couldn't even move, but I think I growled. My throat felt so parched that I had a hard time making a sound. Every extremity of my body felt weak, useless. But I think someone heard me whimper from the pain.

"Hey! You're awake!"

I knew that voice. It was him. My boss.

My beloved.

I opened my eyes. It was dark, with only a little light by a door in the room. And he was leaning before me.

"How are you?" He seemed to whisper, "You were in a coma for a week, we were so worried. Your parents and sister were here watching over you, but I made them eat dinner first. They were really reluctant to leave you though, but I told them I can take care of you."

A week? In my dream, it seemed like it were years.

I tried to speak, but there was a tube stuck down my throat, and I grasped at his hand. I pointed at the contraption on my throat.

He smiled apologetically, "Sorry, but the doctors said it can't be removed yet, at least not until you've fully recovered."

I rolled my eyes in annoyance, and he laughed. I noticed that he had been doing some of his work while he was watching over me. I pointed at his pen and paper. He took it and laid it beside me. It was hard with the pain and the needle on my right hand, but I was able to scrawl out _WORK?_

"No, you're not fired yet." He said, "I felt positive you were going to wake up in weeks. The doctors thought it too. You were injured pretty badly, but they said that your brain went into some sort of shock or something, but you'll wake up eventually. I had one of the Librarians from a local school take over your position while you're recovering."

_PARENTS? FAMILY?_ I scrawled out again.

"Don't worry, they're just eating, like I said. They'll be so happy you're awake. The Police were able to catch the guy who ran you over. He's awaiting trial now. Your father made sure it was quick…"

_YOU?_ I scrawled again.

He seemed silent for a moment, "I'm fine. I was just worried about you, that's why I visited…"

My eyebrows furrowed. _IS THAT ALL?_

He looked at me, shaking his head a little. "What do you mean?"

It was now or never.

_I LOVE YOU._

He looked down at my paper, and sighed. He let go of my hand and went to a corner and pulled a chair. He sat down beside me, holding my arm.

"I… Thank you." He started, "Thank you for loving me, and for telling me the truth. But I… I love someone else." He looked at me, as if waiting for me to cry, but I didn't. I merely waited, and soon he continued, "You are a great and wonderful woman. And I know that there is someone else out there who will love everything there is about you. But, it's not me. I hope you understand. I can love you as a friend, as a colleague, but… as a man, I can't…"

I nodded. Somehow, somewhere in the back of my head, this was going to happened. Perhaps, during my time in Dreaming, I realized this and accepted it. I wasn't afraid anymore, and I accepted it all.

I took the pen again and scrawled out, _I UNDERSTAND._

He saw it and smiled, "Thank you." He took my hand, and kissed it. His lips were as warm and soft as it was in my dream, but the feeling was different. To me it was like a friend comforting me. "Someday, someone is going to love you so much. I know it."

I nodded, and closed my eyes, as if to sleep. In fact, I really was tired. I think he felt it. He kissed my forehead and whispered, "I can hear your parents outside now. I got to get back to the office to sort some things out. You rest up okay?"

I nodded a little again, and I pretended to sleep, and soon I could hear him walking out the door, and talking to my parents. He told them I woke, but I was tired again, and went back to sleep. I could hear my mother's gasp of surprise and happiness, and my sister and father's fervent thank-yous to God. But I just closed my eyes. I wanted to sleep. I wanted to dream.

I wanted to dream of him again, to dream of him beside me, and kissing me, and loving me.

Perhaps someday, someone might take me away from this dream. Perhaps he'll even give me a new dream. But until I do meet him, and until I start dreaming of him, my boss… my beloved will still be the one in my dreams who will take me to his arms and love me in a field of flowers.

And that was enough to make me happy.


	11. Chapter 7 Ending 3

It was darkness. And there was pain.

I couldn't even move, but I think I growled. My throat felt so parched that I had a hard time making a sound. Every extremity of my body felt weak, useless. But I think someone heard me whimper from the pain.

"Hey! You're awake!"

I knew that voice. It was him. My boss.

My beloved.

I opened my eyes. It was dark, with only a little light by a door in the room. And he was leaning before me.

"How are you?" He seemed to whisper, "You were in a coma for a week, we were so worried. Your parents and sister were here watching over you, but I made them eat dinner first. They were really reluctant to leave you though, but I told them I can take care of you."

A week? In my dream, it seemed like it were years.

I tried to speak, but there was a tube stuck down my throat, and I grasped at his hand. I pointed at the contraption on my throat.

He smiled apologetically, "Sorry, but the doctors said it can't be removed it, at least not until you've fully recovered."

I rolled my eyes in annoyance, and he laughed. I noticed that he had been doing some of his work while he was watching over me. I pointed at his pen and paper. He took it and laid it beside me. It was hard with the pain and the needle on my right hand, but I was able to scrawl out _WORK?_

"No, you're not fired yet." He said, "I felt positive you were going to wake up in weeks. The doctors thought it too. You were injured pretty badly, but they said that your brain went into some sort of shock or something, but you'll wake up eventually. I had one of the Librarians from a local school take over your position while you're recovering."

_PARENTS? FAMILY?_ I scrawled out again.

"Don't worry, they're just eating, like I said. They'll be so happy you're awake. The Police were able to catch the guy who ran you over. He's awaiting trial now. Your father made sure it was quick…"

_YOU?_ I scrawled again.

He seemed silent for a moment, "I'm fine. I was just worried about you, that's why I visited…"

My eyebrows furrowed. _IS THAT ALL?_

He looked at me, shaking his head a little. "What do you mean?"

It was now or never.

_I LOVE YOU._

He looked at me, his eyes widening in shock. I let go of the pen, and held on to his hand. And to my shock, he held it back and leaned his head to my ear. I felt something wet by my cheek, and it turned out to be his tears. He inhaled.

"I love you, too." He whispered fervently, and it made lose my breath a little. " I've always loved you. From the moment you walked into my office with that smile, and you introduced yourself to me, I have loved you.I was wrong to think another woman would make me not look at you, but I was wrong. I've been waiting for you to wake up. I was afraid you wouldn't. Please don't do that to me again. I love you so much that I couldn't dare lose you."

He looked up at me and kissed my forehead. And I felt tears form in my eyes and drop down. I was so happy. He wiped it away, and he bent down to kiss me by the corner of my lip. When he straightened again, he pushed for the call button.

He grinned, "Let's get rid of this thing in your mouth so I can kiss you properly."

I chuckled a little, and sighed contently on my bed as he sat down beside me, holding my hand.

I didn't need my dreams anymore.

This… is my reality now.


End file.
